Just because I'm losing
Doesn't mean I'm lost
Doesn't mean I'll stop
Doesn't mean I will cross
Just because I'm hurting
Doesn't mean I'm hurt
Doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserve
No better and no worse
I just got lost
Every river that I've tried to cross
And every door I ever tried was locked
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off...
You might be a big fish
In a little pond
Doesn't mean you've won
'Cause along may come
A bigger one
And you'll be lost
Every river that you tried to cross
Every gun you ever held went off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the firing stops
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off
I found this Picture... credit to whoever that posted this on tumblr. I love the words on it.. This is what i'm feeling right now.
"ITS HARD TO WAIT AROUND FOR SOMETHING THAT YOU KNOW MIGHT NEVER HAPPEN.. BUT ITS HARDER TO LET IT GO... WHEN ITS THE ONLY THING YOU WANT "
Its hard for me to think about the future. I'm really scared .. i dont know how to face it... I wanna be with you but your thoughts, ur principles, all are different to mine. to my environtment... sometimes i wish i could runaway to you and do everything i want without thinking about my family etc.
it makes me Depressed, Lost ...
Today is my Birthday .. people semetimes see this as special day.. coz u was born in Valentine day.. But for me .. There's nothing special about it.. at least for 25 years old ... nothing special.
i was ordinary girl same like the other teenagers who loves to celebrate birthday, get gifts , wishes, surrounded by someone special. well, But i never get those things. i never celebrate birthday or get gifts.. FLAT !! ha ha
the saddest thing was hmm probably my 17th Birthday.. i was celebrate my BD alone inside of my room with candles and donuts and heart ice cream. sooooooo sad hahahahaha..
Tonight 00.00 14 Februari 2011 .. getting older huh..
I just want to be happy .. i need to be more positive and Wiser... more adult and i want to be more patience and less sensitive. Try to Smile wider and Less pretending ( pretend to be smile outside but cry inside ) .. i want to be more open minded .. and i could open my heart to people.. less Ignorant.. I want to be loved.. i want to be someone's special... i pretend to be stronger but still i'm weak.. ah and be healthier person..
i always hope that there is something different between last BD and this year BD ... so what is the diff???
hmmmmmmm NOTHING ..
well i feel weaker, my healthy is shit...
well i have unclear position in my office..
well i have CRAZY STRANGE PATHETIC feelings to this 'strange unique weird crazy guy'
well i still THANKS to YOU GOD for giving me life till now..
LOVE U GOD ... Hopefully i could be closer and fix everything in the future.
LOVE U MOM ... wish u were here Mommy ..
LOVE U my Unique love... will always do even u dont love me like i love u ..
Last but not least
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME ..
Wish i could be happier <3
`Zie`
Besok adalah tanggal 14 Februari 2011. Ada Apa di tanggal itu?? its Valentine's day Zie.. hari ini gw hang out ke Mall di kota gw. dan sudah gw duga sebelumnya kalo di semua sudut toko2 pasti udah berubah warna jadi PINK.. malah ada satu stand khusus buat kalian yang mau beli special Valentine gift for ur lover. dari mulai coklat sampe bunga mawar.. ewwwwww well i'm not romantic person so it was a bit awkward to saw lots of things like that.
Dan lagi gw ga pernah ngerayain Valentine, selain emang selalu sial krn gw selalu ga pernah lagi punya pacar kalo pas Valentine hahahaha and emang ya itu tadi gw bukan termasuk orang yang romantis dan peduli dengan hal2 seperti itu. Tapi ada moment Valentine yang ga pernah gw lupa.. gw pernah dapet coklat dari cowo yang gw suka sekitar 2 tahun yang lalu.. sweet banget dah walopun kita ga sempet jadian setelah itu.. ;(
Penting ga sih ngerayain Valentine??? gw punya pendapat pribadi tentang hal ini dan gw yakin banyak juga yang berpendapat sama .. kalo memang moment valentine katanya dibilang hari kasih sayang, hari dimana seseorang mengutarakan perasaan cinta nya , hari dimana diisi dengan penuh cinta baik itu ke Pacar, keluarga, teman dll. buat gw.. ga harus selalu di hari valentine.. it could be valentine everyday.. dan buat kaum Muslim, its not Important .. bahkan di budaya kita ga ada valentine2an.
tapi yang buat sekedar Fun... well its up to you guys... :)
Tahun ini sehari setelah hari valentine, di tanggal 15 Februari 2011 kaum muslim bakal merayakan hari kelahiran NABI BESAR MUHAMMAD SAW.. karena hal inilah banyak yang menanyakan .. lu mau ngerayain valentine atau Maulud Nabi ?? well, ini sebenranya hak setiap orang .. untuk kaum muslim tentu aja lebih baik dan afdol untuk merayakan Maulud Nabi.. yang Non Islam tentu ga bakal mauludan donk...
Di twitter pun semept nongol di trending topic tentang ini.. dan once again its up to u guys.. for muslim.. lets Mauludan di Mesjid masing2 ..
InsyaAllah sebagai muslim gw juga mau muludan aja dah ... oke cuy :)
`Zie~
Finally Team Djokovic can LAUGH so hard .. well i know this kinda late .. tooooo late.. but i still wanna post it :)
I was so happy like crazy when finally my Lovely Djokovic won his second grandslam title..i wasnt sure about him at first.. coz he made too much drama lately..and the draw also looked not too good but i had nothing to say after his performance. very strong, powerful, confidence, very positive.. he looked different. very strong.
After he played against Berdych.. i was more confidence about him. Even when he must play against Federer, i was still very sure that he would win this. In my opinion, federer played not in his best play so no doubt Nole would win this. And i was right.. He won the match straight sets.. went through to Final against MURRAY ..
honestly, i wasnt sure that Novak would win over Murray , coz Murray played really good but it was just like out of expectation.. Murray played really bad.. And that was it .. NOVAK WON Straight sets and took the trophy ...
CONGRATS NOVAK
look forward for another Grandslams
Always love
`Zie`
Its been a while ...
Lots of things happened in these last few days or weeks,, i had these crazy feelings.
I cant even describe into words. And No one understand..
SAD...
SCARED...
UPSET...
ANGRY...
NUMB...
BLANK...
EMPTY...
CRAZY...
those feelings made me so crazy ... I felt so down. Try to be strong and face it by my self. I know that no one can help me .. not even my mom, my bro, my friend, my "boyfriend",... And in that condition, someone who i need the most made me Crazy even more.. Pushed me with lots of questions, gave me rude words, told about what kind of women i am, talked about lots of things about him self that made me think more negative. Always wrong... speak wrong, quiet wrong..
i know he tried to help me .. but i also confused about this,, is it because thyroid..??? maybe yes maybe not... i just feel different.. feel sad, lost, gloomy .. feelings that i've felt few years ago..
i feel Lonely.. not because he is busy .. i already knew how to handle that.. but still LONELY and so shocking that i was thinking about hurting my self like what i did few years back. i felt that maybe it could make me better.
BUT .. I STILL HAVE GOD.. i Believe in YOU .. PLEASE GIVE ME STRENGHT AND TAKE THESE BAD FEELINGS AWAY FROM ME,,,
to be continued,,,,,
`ZIE`
Depressing weeks for me as Tennis fan ...
gimana nggak?? 2 minggu ini ada Turnamen Bergensi Tenis Dunia .. GRANDSLAM AUSTRALIAN OPEN 2011.. kenapa bisa stres?? ya iya lah .. Schedule yang ga menguntungkan buat gw.
Dimulai dari jam 8 pagi WIB sampe Jam 6 sore WIB... yg notabene itu adalah jadwal gw NGANTOR .. apalagi kalo giliran yang maen DJOKOVIC.. bisa kaya orang gila gw.
Kaya apa yang terjadi hari ini ...
gw tau, hari ini ada jadwal Nole -nama panggilanny Djokovic- maen.. tepatnya jam setengah 4 sore .. dan jadwal segitu masih 1 jam sebelum gw pulang kantor. Belum lagi gw harus naek bis dulu baru bisa nyampe rumah.. it means mungkin baru sekitar jam 6 gw bisa nonton Nole maen.
Gw udah ada rencana mau pulang cepet nih. Jam 4 maksimal gw pulang, jadi jam 5 nyampe rumah.. masih bisa tuh liat Nole. Tapi kenyataannya ga bisa cuy. Akhirnya gw baru bisa balik jam setengah lima dengan keadaan hujan gede banget..dan Nole udah maen setengah set ...
Di angkot gw udah cerewet aja bilang ke supirnya supaya ga pake ngetem and pas turun .. buset bis nya ngelewat gitu... dengan ga sadar gw lari sekenceng2 nya sambil teriaaaak.. padahal gw pake High heels yang biasanya boro2 gw lari, gw jalan aja mesti hati2 kalo ga mau jatoh. gw tau kalo gw ga lari and ga teriak minta berhenti ..gw palingan bisa setengah jam baru bisa naek bis selanjutnya.. and gw ga mauuu!! di otak gw udah ada Nole aja gitu ... hahahahahaha
masih kebayang gimana orang2 ngeliatin gw waktu itu.. aaah bodo amat, yang penting bisa juga akhirnya naek Bis MGI ...
Di bis, gw cuman bisa berharap nih bis bakalan cepet nyampenya.. sambil terus ngeliatin BB gw livescorin Pertandingannya Nole... dan akhirnya jam setengah 6 sore, nyampe juga ke rumah.. masih pake sepatu, lengkap baju kantor.. gw nyelonong aja masuk ke ruang keluarga, bawa remote langsung teriak2 coz Nole udah menang 2 set wakakakakk....
yah itulah kegilaan gw.. dan ini masih akan berlansung sampe minggu kalo Nole masuk Final. Hari kamis Nole maen lawan Federer di Semifinal dan gw blm tau jadwalnya.. pastinya gw bakalan lebih stres kalo Nole maennya pagi.. Ga akan bisa gw nonton *pengen nangi sejadi2nya*
Well we'll see
^^ Zie ^^
video
Lyric
jangan dekat atau
jangan datang kepadaku lagi
aku semakin tersiksa
karena tak memilikimu
ku coba jalani hari
dengan mengganti dirimu
tapi hatiku selalu
berpihak lagi padamu
mengapa semua ini
terjadi kepadaku
reff:
Tuhan maafkan diri ini
Yang tak pernah bisa
Menjauh dari angan tentangnya
namun apalah daya ini
bila ternyata sesungguhnya
aku terlalu cinta dia
Happiness - ALEXIS JORDAN
Mmm mmm mmm mmm (4x)
I gotta turn this car around
I never should have left you there
Boy this traffic is making me sick
Boy I can’t wait to have you near
I gotta hurry hurry hurry
Now quick quick quick
Just step on the gas cause I don’t wanna miss this
This opportunity will only come once in my life, my life
I gotta hurry hurry hurry
Now quick quick quick
Just step on the gas cause I don’t wanna miss this
See what your bringin me boy is priceless
I gotta be out of my mind not to try this
Through strength I found love
In time I found myself in happiness with you (x2)
Mmm mmm mmm mmm (4x)
Boy I need to say what’s in my heart
I was scared but I’ll do my part
I came back to tell you face to face
So what we have won’t go to waste
I gotta hurry hurry hurry
Now quick quick quick
Just step on the gas cause I don’t wanna miss this
This opportunity will only come once in my life, my life Yeah
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
Sorry sorry sorry I’m coming down to fix this
You should know how I feel I know I got you twisted
See what your bringin me boy is priceless
I gotta be out of my mind not to try this
Through strength I found love
In time I found myself in happiness with you (2x)
The things that you can give to me
I can feel it when your holding me close
You're like one of those "i wonders"
I know I’m going under
Come see that I’m ready for this
And you're so good for me
You’re my true joy
You make me wanna say
Mmm mmm mmm mmm (4x)
Through strength I found love
In time I found myself in happiness with you (2x)
hmmm Siapa yang ga tau Novak Djokovic .. Buat pecinta Tenis pasti tau sama petenis yang satu ini.. He is my FAV tennis player ever .. He has everything i love.. he is Great tennis player.. not as great as Federer on Nadal but He is Great. He is a joker.. seneng banget becanda, kalo liat Interview or video nya dia di utube .. semua kocaaaak.. dan itu yg membuat gw CInta Mati ma ni Cowo .. hadeeeeeh !!!
Emang telat mengetahui keberadaan petenis yang satu ini. Jujur gw baru liat turnamen2 yang dia ikutin dari akhir tahun 2009 ..i missed his greatest moment .. won his first Grandslam In Australian open januari 2008. So sad... tapi mudah2an dia bisa menangin lagi Another grandslam in the future.. hope so .
Gw suka banget ma tenis.. so i will post lots of things about tennis in the future ..
kalo gw ga terlalu Lazy ofcourse ha ha
This is the web where u can find more about Djoker
www.novakdjokovic.rs
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Novak_Djokovic
